If you’ve ever found yourself thinking, “Why does this always happen to me?” when faced with a financial challenge, you’re not alone. Whether it’s an unexpected expense, a bill that catches you off guard, or a dip in income that sends you spiralling into panic, money challenges can feel deeply personal. They often trigger emotions like shame, fear, or frustration—and many people respond by either shutting down completely or pushing through with a sense of defeat.

But here’s something I’ve learned—both in my personal life and through years of mentoring others: how you respond to financial stress is a reflection of your mindset, not your worth. And your mindset can change.

The idea of a growth mindset comes from the work of psychologist Carol Dweck, who discovered that people tend to approach life with one of two beliefs: either they see their abilities as fixed, or they believe they can grow and improve through effort, learning and support. When applied to finances, this distinction is powerful.

A fixed mindset says:
“I’m just bad with money.”
“I’ll never get out of this.”
“I wasn’t taught this stuff, so it’s too late for me.”

A growth mindset says:
“This is hard, but I can learn from it.”
“I might not have the answers yet, but I’m open to finding them.”
“Every challenge is a chance to make a new decision.”

When I started looking at my financial experiences through the lens of growth, everything shifted. I stopped seeing challenges as proof I was failing and started seeing them as feedback—clues that helped me understand where I needed to pay attention, what I needed to change, and how I could support myself better.

For example, I had a pattern of being terrified to check my bank account. I'd avoid it for weeks, sometimes longer, and then feel sick when I finally looked. That avoidance wasn't just a bad habit—it was a signal. A signal that I needed to create safety in my relationship with money. That I needed to stop punishing myself for every financial misstep and instead start getting curious.

So I asked myself: What would it look like to treat this like a growth opportunity?

The answer wasn’t to shame myself into submission. It was to build new habits with kindness. To track my spending without judging it. To set goals that felt aligned, not punishing. To get help when I needed it, instead of struggling in silence.

That’s the beauty of a growth mindset—it allows space for imperfection while still pointing you towards progress. It lets you be human while holding the belief that things can change.

When clients come to me feeling stuck, this is often where we begin. We gently unpick the story they’ve been telling themselves about money—usually one rooted in guilt, fear or resignation—and start to explore what else might be true.

• What if this setback isn’t the end of the story, but the beginning of a breakthrough?

• What if this situation is highlighting something you’re now ready to shift?

• What if this challenge is your invitation to build stronger foundations—for the version of you you’re becoming?

This is what I know: every financial challenge you face is asking something of you. Sometimes it’s asking for clarity. Sometimes it’s asking for boundaries. Sometimes it’s simply asking you to stop pretending everything is fine when it isn’t—and to make a change.

But when you meet those challenges with a mindset of growth rather than defeat, you reclaim your power.

You stop waiting to “get it right” and start showing up for your future self—one decision at a time.

So if you’re navigating something difficult right now, ask yourself:

• What is this here to teach me?

• What can I do differently moving forward?

• Where can I grow from here?

Your answers won’t just help you through this moment—they’ll shape your relationship with money for years to come. Because financial growth isn’t about perfection. It’s about awareness. It’s about being willing to try again. And most of all, it’s about believing that you’re capable of change—even when things feel hard. That belief, more than anything else, is what turns a challenge into a turning point.